Reflections

On Shifting Gears

Here I am in my new home office, listening as Mennonites in their buggies ride by on their way to church. Bonnie is sleeping in her bed at my feet (the hardwood floors are hard on her hips, so I'm investing in plenty of dog beds.) This morning we walked across the street, down a gravel road and through Mr. Baker's farm. Last week at this time I was frantically packing boxes. Tomorrow I start the new job at Bucknell. This is a curious bucolic limbo.

I feel disoriented and distracted; everything seems a bit unreal and uncertain. I've been running at what feels like full tilt for the last eight years, and in particular for this last one. I'm not quite sure what to do with a Sunday. So I'm going to the hardware store in a little while to pick up more paint and finish painting my bookshelves. Another first - I've painted plenty of sets, but never *real* furniture. If this is successful I'm going to talk to my landpeople about painting the master bedroom - it's a weird dark rose color now that is downright unpleasant.

I'm excited about the new job, but am trying not to anticipate what Bucknell expects of a Digital Scholarship Coordinator. I've made a conscious effort to avoid jumping in before I start if only because I want to understand what they want before I tell them what I think. I can't manage projects until I know the people involved or what they are trying to accomplish.

The summer stretches ahead with plenty of question marks, but also with the realization that I need to ground myself. I haven't really made the time to process my mother's death - that looks weird when I read it, but I can't think of another way to put it. It would be easy to say that I haven't had the time to do so, but I've let the end of the semester and the acceptance of the Bucknell offer and the move get in the way. Now they're all behind me.

So that's me taking stock on a Sunday morning. This week will be full of the mechanics of starting a new job. When I next write the tone will probably be very different and probably back to ruminations on things digital. But for now it's good to do physical things like painting and unpacking.

Anon.

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